just mrs jess

i'm so mad. SO mad. i know i've been that way for a while now, i just didn't realize it until recently. i know i need to give my anger time and respect to say its piece. and i know my anger is justified. i can definitely rationalize it from every angle. but i don't like it. i don't like being angry. i don't even like the word angry. it's not pretty at all. it makes me grimace. i'm not exactly sure why. actually, i have a couple of guesses, but i don't really feel the need to expound on those here. i just need to say that i'm angry. that's a big enough step for now. figuring out what to do next will come soon enough. but for now, i'm angry. and i'm angry that i'm angry. maybe dr. lentz is right after all when he says that anger begets anger. that makes me mad if that's the case. way mad.